Ever felt like you're stuck in the middle of some knock, knock joke world? Constantly being quizzed, laughed at, and nobody quite gets you? That is me this week! Wowza! So I've been asking myself these questions.. When will I feel as though my life has meaning? When will people stop doubting me, stop shutting me down, and stop disregarding my feelings? When will people start realizing that I'm valuable? When will people GET me?
Here's the thing: I will not settle for less than I deserve (Got that? I WILL NOT SETTLE).. but lately, I find myself doubting my future .. Now, when I say that I'm doubting my future, I don't doubt my ability to do ANYTHING. In fact, quite the opposite is true. Once I set my mind to something I can accomplish anything (except perhaps rebuilding a jet engine, OR developing the next Nobel prize winning physics equation)..Other people however, must think I am completely clueless about life in general! This assumption of mine (that people think I'm clueless) is based solely on their reactions TO me; as a person, a coworker, a friend, a business partner, etc.. It's like I'm a small child who can't understand "big people" words. This is how most conversations are going in my head this week:
Me: Knock, knock
People: Who's there?
Me: I'm an ADULT.. I heard you the first fifty times you told me that!!!" <-- Well, that's what it sounds like in my head anyway.
The words that come out of my mouth are much different... less sarcastic, more straight forward. (Usually *wink, wink*)
How is it I can be so outspoken in some aspects of my life, and so guarded in others?
People often confuse my guarded-ness with stupidity, lack of self-confidence, lack of pride, lack of motivation, or.. WHATEVER!!!
I think that it's time people stop underestimating me..Tomorrow I take the guard down! What is the worst that could happen, right?
Any thoughts? Anyone? :)
No comments:
Post a Comment